Post-Grad Plans for Love

We all know the dreaded question…

“What are YOU doing after graduation?”

by Schlüsselbein2007

With commencements of all sorts coming up in May, you are forced to ask yourself, “What will I be doing?”

Of course, this is primarily a happy time. One chapter of your life is coming to an end and the next journey is about to start.

For the more laid-back graduate, vague thoughts about jobs, internships and travel float gently through the mind. For the real go-getters, plans are already made and settled. On to the next one, so to speak.

But what happens when it comes to your relationship?

At some point or another, whether it be your first “love” in the fifth grade or your fiance at the end of college, you have to ask yourself where it’s all going.

That’s not an easy question to answer, by any stretch of the imagination.

If you’re in a short-term relationship it may be easier just to call it quits after graduation, or after a fun summer together.

If you’re in a long-term relationship, you’ve probably already discussed the options with your partner on what to do after commencement or at the very least, thought about what you want to do.

Other Relationship Issues That Arise With Graduation

• Long Distance Issues: Will you or your significant other be moving after graduation?
• What do you really have in common? Many couples realize that the only thing holding them together was school or the shared interest of classes, extra-curricular activities or location.
• Trust and commitment. Do you trust your partner once you’re no longer in the same social circle/doing the same things in life?

Couple Spotlight

Meet Lee and Jake. Lee Howard is graduating from UT in May and her boyfriend Jake Rodriguez, is graduating from St. Edward’s in August. They’ve been dating for about 8 months now, and have already discussed the future of their relationship. I sat down with them and asked a few questions to help us all out.

by pedrosimoes7

Love, Austin: What are your plans for school and career after graduation?

Jake Rodriguez: I will be attending UTSA for the next several years, working towards becoming a dentist.

Lee Howard: I am also moving to San Antonio to be with Jake, and pursue a job in journalism there.

LA: You two have already talked about your relationship after commencement. What are some of the main points that came out of that discussion?

JR: Well to be honest, we were kind of avoiding the topic for quite some time. We both knew we had to approach it gently, and waited for the right time. Once we talked, it was like a great weight lifted off my shoulders. We talked about a lot of different things, but if I had to narrow it down, the most important points to discuss are these:

• What is the distance going to be like? Are you staying in the same city? Are you moving apart? Or are you moving together?
• Do we trust each other to share this next stage of our lives together?
• What do we even want out of this relationship in the future?

LH: Those are some of the things we talked about, but adding to the list:

• It is important to define your relationship, but also important not to go overboard with the whole thing. Think about what you want now, and how that may change in the future.
• Accept that despite any plans made, they are all subject to change. This isn’t a bad thing…it’s just kind of scary!

LA: So what was the verdict?

JR: We decided to keep the good thing going. It will be nice to have Lee in San Antonio with me, in a new place that I’m unfamiliar with. I’m also looking forward to continuing the partnership because we’re both mature adults and actually discussed the issue without any awkwardness. That was a big sign for me.

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So what can we take from Lee and Jake?

• It may seem like a daunting conversation to have, but you must discuss it if you’re interested in keeping the relationship going past graduation.
• How the conversation goes is a great indicator of how the relationship will continue. A little awkwardness is expected, but if the conversation is totally one-sided or vague, you may want to really step back and think about where the relationship is.
• Main point: Talk it out!

Let Love, Austin know how your post-grad plans turn out. I have yet to figure out mine…